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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27736231">Cruel and Unusual Punishment</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTimelessChild0/pseuds/Fedora%20Of%20Adorableness'>Fedora Of Adorableness (TheTimelessChild0)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Omovember 2020 [27]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>White Collar</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Flashbacks, Fluff and Humor, Friendship, Omovember 2020, Omovember 27, Urination, wetting someone else's clothes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 18:48:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>926</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27736231</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTimelessChild0/pseuds/Fedora%20Of%20Adorableness</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>One time Neal did <i>not</i> look good in orange.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Omovember 2020 [27]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1987816</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>WC²</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Cruel and Unusual Punishment</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Neal was getting ready for work in the back room; when Peter decided to peek inside the cardboard box in the corner. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What’s in the box?” he inquired.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, just all sorts of stuff I had before I went to prison...and some stuff from inside,” Neal explained.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>This intrigued the Suit further, so he opened it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“What, your investigations didn’t tell you enough about me?” Caffrey chuckled at the sight, tying his tie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“You didn’t exactly chronicle your life story on those birthday cards,” Burke pointed out.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>At the top of the pile of belongings, was a piece of dark blue polyester fabric. Like a blanket, but recycled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“Where’d you get this thingamajig?” he indicated the item to its owner.</span>
</p><p>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“Bobby gave it to me,” Neal stated simply, occupying himself in the mirror.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Bobby?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Guard at the prison,” he explained.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, what the hell is it supposed to be?” Peter held it up, puzzled.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“A Snuggie, duh,”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Looks more like a </span>
  <em>
    <span>serape</span>
  </em>
  <span> to me,” Burke remarked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It had shorter armholes, which made it look like a t-shirt. It was quintessential DIY.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Pull a loose thread on your orange jumpsuit or something?” the agent registered further befuddlement.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No..It..had to be cleaned,” Neal murmured.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Cleaned?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Someone spill milk at you in the cafeteria line?” Peter guessed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I wish,” he sighed. “I got into a fight in the yard,”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He didn’t know who started it. Not that it mattered. He didn’t know </span>
  <em>
    <span>when </span>
  </em>
  <span>it started either. All he knew was that it originated in a stupid argument with a stupid guy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neal had attempted to leave, giving up on drilling his point through his challenger’s thick skull; when the man had grabbed him and yelled. He’d snapped and slapped him, directing a punch his way. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He ducked, and pinned the other guy's arms behind his back. Then was promptly tripped, and retaliated. The tussle continued with swings that didn’t hit and a few that did. No blood on his end. When he went for the guy's knee, he was pummeled in the stomach and went down.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He hadn’t even known he had to go, until it was too late. The aggression had taken precedence over base sensations.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Story of his life</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The blow had been struck just south enough to ripple through his bladder wall and connected muscles. The second he hit the ground, it came pouring out. He mouthed ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck’</span>
  </em>
  <span>, looking at the ground. No eye contact was key. Not with his opponent, not with the other inmates not with the guards...this was entirely for his own benefit. He didn’t want to see what they thought of him now. His plan had been to be invisible. Yeah, </span>
  <em>
    <span>so much</span>
  </em>
  <span> for that...</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He was silent. He sat still. He saw Bobby heading over to him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Break it up, guys! Time out!” the large lawman parted the orange sea. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What the hell is this?!!! I’m here trying to turn you into civilised members of society. Well, guess what, wise-ass, this </span>
  <span>ain’t</span>
  <span> it! Now get your temperamental tushies inside!” he barked briskly at the bullies circling Caffrey.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He approached Neal calmly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Caffrey I’m sorry I yelled so loud,” Bobby apologised; knowing the last thing you needed when so thoroughly humiliated, was screaming. He indicated for the con man to stand up, which he did, blushing at the puddle he left behind.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Come on, let’s set it right again,” he beckoned to the still mute man, who nodded. The guard put his hand on Neal’s back, for comfort rather than control. He kept his hand as close to his shoulder as he could without breaking safety procedures. Staff weren’t supposed to trust their inmates enough to keep their limbs so close; and available for the prisoners to grab and use to take the guard down. He knew the young adult next to him would never do any of those things, but rules were rules. A concept he was also introducing to Neal...</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, Bobby,” Neal apologised.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“For the fight?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“And the suit,” he indicated the stain on the lower part of his clothing.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It was an accident. You wash and walk away,” Bobby advised.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The security of the facility meant there was no spare set of clothes for him to wear. They were thought to be used as a means of escape, so each new pair was given on the day the old was dropped off to the laundry. Rules were rules.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>While Neal was in the bathroom, </span>
  <em>
    <span>washing</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Bobby walked to the workshop and found an old blanket. Drawing circles on the material, he managed to turn into into a cape of sorts. Enough to last a fella through the night anyway. Given the privacy of his cell, Caffrey couldn’t care less what it was telling the other inmates. They either knew what happened or they didn’t; and if they didn’t they’d assume he’d done something to lose the right to his conventional clothes. It kept him warm. He liked it. So much so that he hid it in the corner of his cell and used it at night when the winter came. It had his name on it, so when it eventually needed to be washed as well, it came back with his jumpsuit.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peter hugged Neal.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The End.</span>
</p>
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